A PLACE TO LEARN THE BASICS OF FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT – BY WOMEN FOR WOMEN

Archive for July, 2013

Have You Lost Trust In Your Relationship?

This is from Kimberly who is an accountability coach and businesswomen. I follow her blog about marriage because I admire her story and accomplishments, and how she is real about things. Please read the wisdom she shares with us. The financial part of me celebrates the fact that she and her husband have there paperwork stuff together so the focus at end-of-life can be on the most important things, people. Nice writing at a difficult time.

Marriage Is A Commitment

My life changed this week.  More importantly my marriage changed this week.  I had the unfortunate news this week that my dad had terminal leukemia and the reality is that he probably has about 6 months to live.  The interesting thing about this is I am at peace with him passing.  I have been clear on my feelings for him and the impact he has made in my life.  The part that changed my life was so much deeper than loving him or accepting that he is passing soon.

He has been married for over 21 years to his wife.  They had some pretty good years.  What I discovered this week is the past few years has not been great for them.  She had some health issues and he had his own set of issues.  They lost trust in each other.  He lost trust in her and she lost trust…

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My Monkey Mind-Cultural Differences

monkeys

My monkey mind postings relate to Buddha’s description of the human mind as being filled with drunken monkeys, jumping around, screeching, chattering, and carrying on endlessly. These postings come from my monkey mind.
 
While walking around the town we moved to in the hill country of Texas, I was thinking how different it is culturally from the small gulf coast town where we had been living until recently.  I was recalling  how I had been telling  a young woman there about my mother’s recent move to a nice retirement community.  She had been around my mother and gotten to know her a little.  I could tell that my young friend probably didn’t really know understand the idea of an independent living retirement community, assisted living, or nursing homes.  As with many people in the area we lived, her family roots were in Mexico. 
 
Her reaction reminded me of a presentation I made to a group of people who had recently arrived in Colorado.  One of the not-for-profit agencies offered life skills training to them and I was asked to speak.  Of course nobody told me it was going to be to a group who only understood Spanish.  It was an interesting evening and I learned a lot.
 
Everything had to be translated by their teacher.  She was motivated and capable, so all was well.  It was just a different rhythm than past presentations.  I explained topics such as checking accounts, car insurance, pay slips, insurance, and even investing.  She would then play it back to the group, in Spanish.  She could have said anything, what would I know?  So learning to trust another with my information was the first lesson of the evening.
 
All was going well and the audience seemed to be getting it so I decided to include information about long-term care insurance.  I made my statements and waited for the translation.  When the teacher finished, everyone in the audience started laughing, giggling, and looking at me like I was just a little crazy. There was a big change in the noise level in the room.  The teacher laughed a little too.  I asked her what had made them react that way since the topic never generated that reaction before.  She explained that in their culture nobody goes to retirement or nursing homes, except the nuns.  The elderly are simply a part of the extended family and are cared for by children, grandchildren, and others in the family.  The idea of buying insurance to pay someone to care for them when they were old seemed ridiculous, funny, and clearly a waste of money.  They were entertained, but not impressed.  A first for me.
 
After that evening I would preface my long-term care insurance presentations to acknowledge cultural differences, and then explain the potential value to the customer.  Like I said, I learned a lot that evening. 
 
Until next time.
 
Debra Hadsall
 
 
 logownedy (2)
 
 www.financialfreedomparty.com
blog at http://www.ffptalk.com
 
 
 

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